A massive inner conflict

The liminal age of 23 is one that I’m not finding easy. The encroaching adulthood, the mounting responsibilities and the dissipating fun are all a shock to the system. I feel like the road I’m treading is ready to fork, and I need to take the right path.

Part of me is thinking I can plug away in my current 9-5, maybe move for more money in a year, get a mortgage, all very traditional. But I’d be setting for mediocrity and expectation and never truly living the dream per se. But maybe that’s just life.

Part of me wants to plug away for a year, save cash and then travel. What comes next is a mystery, but most probably ends with me in the same situation I’m in now. Perhaps this option is an okay precursor to the one above.

And then part of me wants to grab the bull by the horns and absorb myself in achieving the dream- writing for a living. I’m all too tempted to quit my job come September, enroll on a Masters degree in creative writing or something similar, and throw myself into writing with all my free time- freelance, creative, anything and everything. Of course, there’s no guarantee of money or of success and again I could end up back where I am now.

It’s a situation I’m struggling with, so I thought I’d write it down, as per my usual managing methods.

Thanks for reading!

8 thoughts on “A massive inner conflict

  1. Honestly I felt like that and still do. Life is always about trail and error, challenges and success and so much more. Plans always change so don’t feel disheartened that something didn’t go accordingly. Just keep working on you and be true to you and all will work out. This was truly lovely thank you for sharing.

    https://thisjustinbytandy.com x

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Don’t feel as though you have to stick to the traditional plan of working in your 9-5 job, moving away, getting a mortgage etc. If it feels more natural to you to divert from this, as though there is another path for you then go for it. Don’t settle for something that maybe isn’t for you just because it’s the norm 🙂

    – Sasha // changingthesails.com

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Very true! I’m in my 9-5 for a couple more months until I have saved enough for my travelling and to move out so I know the feeling, the urge to just go already is too much!


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